“I’m not concerned with your liking or disliking me…….. All I ask is that you respect me as a human being.” ~ Jackie Robinson
Some people would say that society has raised men to be disrespectful towards women. Men, in their own ways, have been taught subtly from a very young age that the world belongs to them; that they are powerful and the “master” among the human species. It is not a conscious act among men to disrespect women. As a matter of fact, some probably don’t even realize the effect of their actions.
Take for instance the guys on the construction site. Their typical way of appreciating a sexy girl walking past is to make noise, do wolf whistling and calling out to her to attract attention. They probably are not aware that what they are doing is making the girl feel like an OBJECT and it’s degrading to most.
According to some experts, this kind of behavior is attributed to certain events that happened earlier in a guy’s life. It can be a trauma caused by trusting a female figure. It could be caused by an abusive or negligent mother, sister, school teach or girl friend that planted a seed deep down in his subconscious mind. Once the seed is planted it will germinate and begin to grow. With continued exposure to neglect or abuse, this negative behavior will grow larger and become more prominent.
There are different subtle and non-subtle signs of disrespect:
- Ignoring when being talked to
- Physical and mental abuse
- Belittling you in public
- Being late and letting women wait
- Self-centered when dealing with women
With this kind of behavior coming from your man, it will eventually undermine and destroy your sense of “SELF”
Disrespect, in any form, is not part of a healthy relationship
Subtle Disrespect may or may not be physical. An example could be the following:
- A push
- Being rude to you
- A slap
- Finger pointing
- Using an angry tone when speaking to you
This kind of behavior of subtle disrespect is – rudeness!
Abuse in any form is a serious sign of disrespect and can be life threatening in any relationship and in this case — you the woman!
Physical signs of Abuse are:
- Screaming at you in Public
- Shoving you
- Slapping you
- Punching or kicking you
Mental Abuse signs are:
- Constant name calling
Emotional forms of abuse are:
Psychological Abuse signs are:
- Low self esteem
- Suicidal thoughts
All forms of abuse are damaging to women’s health and self-esteem.
Do Not Tolerate Disrespect from anyone ever. You deserve better!
Disrespect is about the guy’s attitude. Women don’t have to take it. It is important that you have to love and respect who you are first and always. Once you do, any disrespectful behavior from your man can be recognized and immediately stopped.
It is important to understand why men disrespect women. Here are some reasons why:
First, this is due to low self-esteem. The guy doesn’t have a very high opinion of himself personally. So he gains something of a fake self-esteem from associating himself with a pack (men) who he feels superior to another pack (women).
You see this all the time in other forms. People with weak egos have the tendency to connect themselves to some kind of pack or brotherhood to draw some kind of identity — be it cultural or religious or anything else that allows for an “us” and “them” mentality!
The characteristic of such person is quite odd with the things he dislikes or disrespect which in this case are women. Because he dislikes them, he has a tendency to blame his troubles on the one disdained thing instead of actually working on problems with his own self.
Second, some men are so involved in a power struggle that they feel belittled, put down, and an underdog until he treats a woman rudely to feel big inside. He wants to feel great. It is easier for him to be “manlier” if he behaves like a creep towards women. Thus, it will give him the feeling of superiority and elevation — only if she allows it. His actions will be repeated on her again and again each time he needs to experience the much-needed feeling of power.
Being women, we really must do something in order to be appreciated, respected, and loved. We must recognize that we are not here to be trampled on in any way. The only solution is for women not to tolerate this kind of behavior. Until now, men had no reason to stop behaving in a disrespectful manner towards women because not enough women have been disgusted enough to stand up and not tolerate it!
Because they believe that women are inferior to them, they show their contempt by talking rudely to them, ignoring them, treating them like an animal and much, much worse. If a woman allows this kind of behavior, they are silently confirming that the man has the right to use this negative behavior without reprisal.
Lastly, they learned to disrespect women because of what they have seen this from his own parents or grandparents. If a boy constantly sees women being castigated before them, they then derive the opinion that this is just how women should be treated. Well, it isn’t! If children notice this kind of behavior with their father disrespecting their mother, they have the tendencies to behave in the same disrespectful manner toward women.
This ancient issue about men disrespecting women needs to change and it should start now. It should start with us. This is the reason why I feel it is important that we work together — for men to see women not as a threat and not to be bullied, but for both to be respectful of each other! It all lies in our hands.
Should you stop it and stand up for changes to happen? You should and it should start now.